Yesterday was Valentine’s Day.
Around the world, Valentine’s Day is generally seen as a day when men confess their love to women and give them gifts.
In Japan, however, it works the other way around.
Here, it is traditionally a day when women confess their feelings and give chocolate to men.
It is said that this custom originally began as a marketing campaign by confectionery companies many decades ago.
Over time, it became part of Japanese culture.
No More Excitement
Now that I am in my fifties, Valentine’s Day no longer makes my heart race.
Japan has a concept called giri—a sense of social obligation.
Because of that, women at workplaces often give “obligation chocolate” (giri-choco) to male coworkers.
Even if you receive it, you know it does not necessarily mean anything romantic.
In recent years, even this obligation culture has become weaker.
This year, I did not receive any chocolate at work at all.
However, every year my wife and daughter give me chocolate that suits my taste—usually not too sweet.
They are probably the only people who still acknowledge that I am a “man” on Valentine’s Day.
For that, I am sincerely grateful.
When I Was Younger
Looking back, I think I was fairly popular when I was young.
In Japan, chocolate given as a genuine confession of love is called honmei-choco—“true feeling chocolate.”
There was a year when I received four or five of them.
None of those led to a serious relationship, but at the time, my friends and I competed over how many we would receive.
I remember feeling a small sense of pride.
My Son’s First Chocolate
My junior high school son received his first honmei-choco this year.
He proudly showed it to me.
Seeing that made me realize how much he has grown.
At the same time, the fact that he was so happy he had to tell his father reminded me that he is still very much a child.
And Then Comes White Day
In Japan, there is another day connected to Valentine’s Day: White Day, on March 14.
On that day, men who received chocolate are expected to give something in return—often candy—if they wish to respond to those feelings.
When I was younger, I did not fully understand the meaning behind it.
I gave candy in return to every woman who had given me chocolate.
As for what happened after that…
I will leave that to your imagination.
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